Seedy Tavern

Adventurers often seem to be found in seedy dives and other disreputable drinking establishments.

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Things to See in the Commons

  1. Two men sit at a table drinking. As the evening progresses their conversation gets increasingly heated. Eventually, one of the men slams his empty flagon down on the table and storms out of the tavern.

  2. A drunk half-orc totters through the crowd in search of the privy. He suddenly stops and throws up on the floor. Cheers and laughter greet this event.

  3. A scantily clad woman leaps to her feet and throws a drink into the face of the man with whom she was sitting. With a splutter and roar he staggers to his feet, but the woman is faster—and darts off through the crowded common room.

  4. A half-dozen drinkers sit around a table playing a complicated dice-based gambling game. Many empty flagons stand upon the table; as the evening progresses the drinkers get more and more raucous.

  5. A small group of patrons suddenly break into a rowdy (and obscene) drinking song. The song ends with roars and drunken cheering.

  6. A man sits alone—his head on the table surrounded by several empty wine flagons. Perceptive watchers notice one of the serving wenches relieve the man of his pouch.

Strange Things Behind the bar

  1. An oversized dagger—more the size of a short sword—with a wickedly serrated blade hangs behind the bar. The tip of the weapon is missing. The weapon once belonged to a hill giant and is poorly made; a local claimed to have slain the giant and swapped the dagger for a month of free drinking.

  2. A dusty glass bottle stands on a pedestal in a niche high up behind the bar. Cobwebs cover the bottle and the label is faded and unreadable. Local lore has it that as long as the bottle remains full, good fortune will befall the tavern and its owner.

  3. A battered hat of strange design and appearance rests on one of the ale barrels behind the bar. The yellow felt hat has a red brim and a large ragged hole—where the wearer’s forehead would be.

  4. A cage stands on the counter behind the bar. A single, obviously malnourished and agitated, stirge lurks in the cage. Anyone who tries to leave without paying, or who molests one of the servers, is forced to thrust a hand through the bars to feed the creature. Shockingly, there is little violence and few disturbances in this tavern.

  5. A yellowing giant’s skull hangs from the ceiling over the bar. Burning candles set in the eye sockets give the whole thing an eerie appearance.

  6. A collection of fine and delicate goblets and wine glasses cluster thickly upon a narrow shelf lined with faded yellow cloth. The innkeeper never lets anyone use the glasses—saying they are for “quality” customers only. What he means by this is anyone’s guess. When the inn is quiet he often takes the various glasses down and polishes them carefully.

Seedy Patrons

  1. Quobbis Quibble (LN male gnome): A fat gnome with buck teeth fidgets in supreme discomfort as he constantly looks around the room. Judging by his fine clothes, he shouldn’t be within a hundred yards of this “fine” establishment.

  2. Sibolen Itali (N male elf): A drunk elf with long black hair crawls on the floor, searching for something he has lost (his wedding band).

  3. Ginger Greybeard (CN male dwarf): A deeply tanned and extremely boisterous dwarf mocks his opponent, then swigs another mug of beer in a drinking contest. The amber liquid bubbles in his beard.

  4. Urul (NE female orc): Two sharp tusks protrude from the hood of a figure in a shadowy corner; investigations reveal the individual to be an orc!

Seedy Staff

  1. Eelred Vine (CE male elf): The green-eyed, yellow-haired elf behind the counter is handsome, smiling and totally self-absorbed. He steals glances at his own reflection whenever possible.

  2. Gerey Tere (N male human): The man who serves drinks is mute. His tongue has been cut out and cruel scarring mars his cheeks.

  3. Rida (N female half-elf): The dexterity of this one-handed server is impressive, though why someone so skilled would work in a dump like this is a mystery.

  4. Thori Ghoststone (CG female dwarf): This dwarf bartender is bald. She wears large stone earrings and heavy makeup, and she speaks in a thick difficult-to-place accent.

Credit

This is a short system-neutral extract from 20 Things #1: Seedy Tavern by Creighton Broadhurst.


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